By Goddess Isa
SUMMARY: Angel struggles to celebrate Christmas with his daughters - and
without Buffy
SPOILER: None, but it takes place after IWRY sort of. Doyle never dies, and
Riley never gets kissy with our Slayer.
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P
RATING: TV-14
DISCLAIMER: I own Charlotte and Elizabeth. Joss owns the others. I think
David G kind of owns Doyle.
DEDICATION: To Amanda, 'cause it was her idea. Where she comes up with it
all, I'll never know
"Momma!" Charlotte ran into her parents' bedroom, her slippers making a
scuffing noise on the carpet. "Daddy! Get up! It's Santa Time!"
Angel opened one eye half-way. He found the slock and smirked. "It's
five-thirteen a.m., Charla."
"Daddy!" she whined. "You come. Momma come!"
Angel rolled out of the bed and rubbed his eyes. He took Charla's hand
and they went downstairs together. The four year old ran for her pile of
gifts and Angel noticed three packages had ripped corners as though people
had been snooping. He kept this information to himself as she pulled out toy
after toy. Angel yawned and watched her tear into the last present, a Barbie
townhouse. She looked around and frowned at her father. "Where Momma?"
"Charlotte," he began.
"Make Momma come." she said softly.
Angel sighed. This was getting hard for him. "Charlotte, Momma's gone.
You know that."
"No!" Charlotte covered her ears and began crying hysterically. "No!
Make Momma come! Now!"
He picked her up and walked up and down the long halls of the mansion,
Charlotte wailing all the way. He was just getting her calmed down when--
"WHAAAH!!!!!"
Angel sighed. "Charlotte, I have to go get Elizabeth."
"No! No!" she clung to him. "Don't leave me, Daddy!"
"I'm not leaving you," he said as he walked into the living room. "I'm
just going upstairs for a moment to get your sister."
"No! No!"
Angel hated to do it, but he put Charlotte on the living room couch and
ran upstairs to get the baby.
"Morning, baby," Angel greeted her as he picked her up out of her crib.
"Merry Christmas."
He kissed her cheeks and laid her on her dressing table to change her
diaper. She was only three months old and already, the spitting image of her
mother.
"Oh, Buffy," Angel said as he picked her up again and carried her
downstairs. "Your big sister really needs us to help her today."
Charlotte wasn't where he'd left her on the couch. "Where are you,
Charla?" Angel asked.
Angel heard soft sniffles behind him and saw Charlotte sitting at the
bottom of the staircase. She was holding the Baby's First Elmo toy Buffy had
given her when she was born and sucking her thumb.
"Make Momma come," she whispered between sucking.
"I can't sweetheart." Angel said sincerely. He walked into the kitchen
to feed Buffy and Charla followed.
It felt strange for Angel to be bottle-feeding Elizabeth. Buffy had
proudly breast-fed Charlotte and had planned on doing the same for the new
baby.
"Too bad she never got the chance," Angel muttered.
Charlotte whimpered as Angel tended to Elizabeth. She wound up falling
asleep before Angel was finished with Buffy.
One at a time, Angel carried his girls to the living room and sat on the
couch with Charlotte at his side and Buffy in his arms. He talked to them
for what felt like hours about the past and their mother. Eventually, he
felt as though he were talking to Buffy and not about her, and he felt her
presence in the room.
"God, Buffy, look at us," he said softly. "Charlotte's a mess without
you. She comes into bed every day and calls for you. She cries every night
and holds that Elmo doll all the time.
"And Elizabeth....I've started calling her Buffy, even though I knew we
decided we were going to call her Beth. She won't even get to know you,
Buffy. She'll never know how wonderful you are to be around. How loving,
how sweet. I'm sorry she's missing out on all of that."
He kissed their baby's cheek and then Charlotte's. "I miss you Buffy,"
he whispered as the tears began to fall. "So much."
Later on, Charlotte woke up and found she was alone. "Daddy!" she called
in a panic.
"Daddy!"
He came out of the kitchen after having fed. "Merry Christmas, Charla."
he said as he wiped his mouth, making sure he hadn't smeared any blood on his
lips.
"Merry Christmas." she came over and put her arms around his legs.
"Momma no come home?" she asked.
"No, baby. Momma won't be coming home."
Angel had never heard a child cry so hard before. She sobbed until her
insides hurt. He carried her on his shoulder to the couch and eventually,
she fell back asleep in his lap.
When Charlotte woke up the next time, Angel had Christmas dinner ready
for her. Buffy slept in her carrier beside them and stayed asleep until the
meal was over. When Angel brought out ice cream for dessert, Buffy woke up
and cried as though she wanted some. Angel gave her a bottle instead and she
pushed it away, deciding to play with a Pooh Bear rattle-like toy attached to
the safety bar of her carrier instead.
"I have something to show you, Charla." Angel said after they were
finished.
"Show me?" she asked almost hopefully.
"Come into the living room." he picked Buffy up and carried her into the
next room.
With Elizabeth cushioned on the couch, Angel set the VCR up and put
Charlotte on his lap.
She began to cry softly when Buffy appeared on the screen.
"Hi Mom, Giles, Willow, Xander, Anya, Spike, Cordelia and Doyle!" Buffy
said brightly. "I hope I'm not forgetting anyone.
"We're in Ireland for Christmas this year, so we wanted to send everyone
a video greeting and introduce you to our little princess."
Angel handed a four week old Charlotte to his wife and they briefly
kissed before he sat behind her again, trying to hide from the camera. They
always made him nervous.
"Everyone, meet Charlotte Ireland Angel Summers." Buffy said proudly.
"Charlotte was born on November twenty-sixth and she weighed six pounds and
two ounces. We're gonna come home as soon as we can, probably sometime
around January fifteenth. We love you and miss you all like crazy. Except
of course for Spike." she and Angel both laughed.
Baby Charlotte started to cry and Buffy shifted how she was holding her.
"Someone's hungry so I've gotta say goodbye here. Merry Christmas!! We love
you!"
Buffy waved both her hand and Charlotte's tiny one. When the TV screen
turned blue, Charlotte looked at her father and hugged his chest.
"Thank you, Daddy." she whispered.
He kissed her head and held her close. "Merry Christmas, Sweetheart."