Shut Up and Kiss Me

by Cynamin

SUMMARY: Response to challenge from Garnet. That pretty much sums it up.
SPOILERS: None that I can think of.
DISCLAIMER: Even though NutMeg says I can claim Angel as mine, I don't think Joss would agree with her. The song excerpts are from "Shut Up and Kiss Me" by Mary Chapin Carpenter.
NOTES: Here's the Challenge:
Challenge Requirements:
"Somehow, Angel can be 'happy' and Buffy finds out. But instead of instantly breaking it off with Riley, she just sees him behind everyone's back. Like they are having an affair of sorts. Eventually it will be out in the open, but it would be kind of cool for her to be sneaky behind Riley's back. You can have Buffy and Angel do just about anything....
One idea is that they are exposed by Buffy being pregnant and.....you can figure out the rest."

Things required:
~a long stem rose~
~Riley, at some point, walking in on Buffy and Angel and Angel is feeding off her~
~Angel seeing from the shadows Buffy kiss Riley~
~a REALLY good fight scene between Riley and Angel~
**Required if you make Buffy pregnant in the story**
~Angel putting his face close to Buffy's stomach and somehow knowing, without a doubt, that the child is his~
~the pregnancy goes on a while, I would say, until she is at least showing before Riley is told it is not his~
~Riley uses the Initiative to study up on vampires making babies-----or any other way you want him to prove that the kid is his~
~If you do make Buffy pregnant, story must go all through her pregnancy and span at least until the child is 3~

Prologue

Shopping was supposed to be fun, especially when you didn't have to pay for anything. When Buffy's father had suggested that he take her to the mall while she was visiting, she'd jumped at the opportunity. Now she wasn't so sure.

Spending this much time amidst LA crowds was making Buffy increasingly nervous. Though logically she knew the chances of running into someone she knew in this big of a city were exceedingly small, a part of her expected - and dreaded - just such an encounter. Not that *he* would be in the mall. It was far too sunny, even through the many windows. Besides, the image of *him* in the mall was a bit incongruous. No, she was more worried about running into Cordelia. Cordelia lived to shop, and if she saw Buffy, then *he* would know as well.

"Are you alright?" Hank Summers asked suddenly. Buffy had almost given herself whiplash when she'd spotted someone in a shoe store who bore the vaguest resemblance to Cordelia.

"I'm fine," she replied, trying to shrug it off. The feeling that they were here somewhere just wouldn't go away.

"You've been real jumpy," he said in concern.

Buffy shook her head. "I just thought I saw someone I knew."

"Someone you want to see, or someone you want to avoid?"

'Avoid' was the first response that came to mind. What she said, however, was far more honest. "I don't know."

Her father gave her an odd look, but nodded. "Do you want to get out of here?" he asked.

Buffy nodded slightly. "Yeah. I can't deal with this right now."

"I never thought I'd hear you pass on shopping."

Buffy chuckled. "Stranger things have happened."

Then her grin faded as stranger...happened.

Buffy's back went stiff when she heard a familiar voice. Almost in slow motion she turned. Her eyes did not play tricks on her as before, for it was Cordelia who emerged from the nearby shop, bags in hand. She did not see Buffy; rather she was speaking to someone behind her. Then her male companion emerged - tall, dark haired, familiar. Dressed in his usual black, he stood out in sharp contrast to the happy shoppers around him. He stepped out into the sunny corridor. Then he looked across the passing crowd and saw her.

*Him.*

Angel.

Their gazes met. Angel's eyes went wide.

Buffy fainted.

//Don't mean to get a little forward with you
Don't mean to get ahead of where we are
Don't mean to act a little nervous around you
I'm just a little nervous about my heart 'cause.//

Part One

Buffy's first thought upon returning to consciousness was that that had to be the weirdest dream ever. She'd been shopping with her dad, and then Angel had been there with Cordelia. In the mall, in the sunlight. Then.

"She just fainted," someone said close at hand. "She'll be alright. It's a good thing you caught her before she hit the floor, though."

Footsteps. "How did you do that anyway?" Her dad's voice.

"I have fast reflexes." Angel?

Buffy blinked her eyes open. "Angel? Dad?"

Both men moved into view, half smiles of concern on their faces. Her father helped her sit back up. "You okay?" he asked.

Buffy nodded and looked curiously at her surroundings. She was sitting on a couch in a stark, windowless room. "Where am I?"

"Somewhere in the back offices," Mr. Summers explained. "The mall security brought you here when you fainted."

Buffy's father might have said something more, but Buffy didn't hear any of it. Her gaze met with Angel's and locked. Her eyes filled with unspoken questions. His filled with promised answers.

"Can you leave Angel and me alone for a minute?" Buffy asked. She did not see her father's nod, but she heard the door close behind him.

Neither her nor Angel moved. "Care to explain?" Buffy softly demanded.

"Why? I live here. Why are you here?" His tone was odd.

"I thought it was obvious. I'm visiting my dad," Buffy defended herself. "No, I meant, why are you *here*? In the mall?"

"Cordelia."

"Great, we're back to one word answers. Getting facts from you is like pulling teeth," Buffy said in exasperation. "Sunlight, Angel?"

Angel shrugged. "It's not that sunny."

Buffy glared at him. "That's not an answer."

Angel sighed and shifted uncomfortably. "It's not too bright for me inside," he said. "I've been building up a tolerance to indirect light."

Buffy's eyes went wide. "It's possible for a vampire to do that?"

Now Angel looked really uncomfortable. "Half vampire," he muttered.

If it was possible, Buffy's eyes got even wider. "Since when?"

"A couple of weeks," Angel replied softly. "I prevented. a whole lot of people from getting killed. The Powers gave me this as a reward." He finally got up the nerve to move and took a seat next to Buffy. "For every life I save, I get a bit closer to humanity. And the other way around, too."

"Everyone you fail to save is a step backwards?" Buffy clarified.

Angel nodded.

"So," Buffy asked softly, "what does being 'half vampire,' mean?"

Angel thought for a moment. "I can be outside at sunrise and sunset, and cloudy days are no problem. Any brighter than that, and it's uncomfortable and painful. I don't crave blood as much any more, and sometimes I want human food."

Buffy knew from the look on his face that there was something more that Angel wasn't telling her. "And?" she asked.

Angel looked down. "The curse is a non-issue," he whispered. Buffy heard him clearly.

Joy, anger, and pain. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I told you to move on," he said. "You have a boyfriend. I didn't want to get in the way."

"In the way?!" Buffy asked, aghast. "The last thing you'd be is in the way!"

"I was afraid!" Angel blurted. "I don't think I could take it if you turn me away!"

The hand placed on her forearm was gentle and cool. She looked at it in silence. He still wore a Claddaugh ring, the heart pointed towards him. Friendship, loyalty, and love.

*.means you belong to someone.*

Angel must have read the questions in her eyes. "For you, love. Always for you," he whispered.

"Well then, Angel, shut up and kiss me!"

//It's been a while since I felt this feeling
That everything that you do gives me
It's been too long since somebody whispered
Shut up and kiss me//

Part Two

She really had been planning to break up with Riley. Not immediately, but when the time was right she was going to let him down easy. I mean, you don't just randomly return from visiting your father one weekend and say "Sorry. I have to dump you because I want to have crazy sex with my demonic ex." No, definitely not the nice way to go about it. And Riley had been nice to her. He wasn't just a rebound guy. He was sweet, he took her on picnics and taught her to drive. Oh, and he fought demons too, so they had something in common.

But he wasn't Angel.

She hadn't meant for it to go on this long. She just didn't know how to tell him or anyone else. Willow once asked if having a relationship that was secret made it sexier. It didn't. It was making Buffy sick to her stomach.

Besides, it couldn't get any sexier.

"Then we'll just have to be quiet." No further protests were made.*

A warm hand on Buffy's arm pulled her out of her reverie. "Hey," Riley asked, "where were you just now?"

Somehow Buffy managed not to blush, and she grinned falsely. "Right here," she whispered. She felt guilty, though, and her stomach flipped.

"Good," he replied, and kissed her lightly.

In her mind, though, it wasn't Riley's lips she was kissing. They were Angel's.

*He untucked her shirt and slid his hand up her back. Buffy sighed. How much had she missed his cold hands that only she could warm.. He pressed her back on the couch, which wasn't that comfortable but neither of them cared. He ran his hands along her stomach, lifting her shirt, and then lowered his head to lavish her breasts with kisses.*

"So, I was thinking," Riley said softly when he pulled away, "that maybe we could go somewhere this weekend. There's this lovely park out of town with a lake. It really feels like there's no one around, and it's quiet. Very relaxing. I thought maybe we could bring a picnic lunch and just sort of forget about school."

"And demons?" Buffy asked with a grin.

"And demons," Riley agreed. "I'd love to forget about them."

"Yeah." Well, maybe not *all* demons.

"When did you have in mind?" Buffy asked softly, snuggling close.

"Well," Riley said, "I have training exercises with the Initiative on Saturday. So it would have to be Sunday."

His hand brushed her breast over the fabric of her shirt. "Angel!" Buffy blurted. She couldn't meet Riley on Sunday. She was spending Saturday night with Angel.

Riley looked confused. "Huh?"

Quick, think fast Buffy. "Uh, I have to go to church on Sunday. I haven't been in a really long time and the services are like all day." She feigned a sigh of disappointment. "I'm sorry." She really wasn't.

Riley nodded. "It's okay. Maybe we'll think of something else."

"Yeah, maybe."

"And we have been seeing a lot of each other lately," Riley acknowledged.

"What with the Initiative and all," Buffy finished. A new thought occurred to her. Maybe that was why she was having such a hard time breaking it off with Riley. She didn't know how to stay in touch with the Initiative if it wasn't through him. She didn't trust the Initiative, and she needed to stay close to him if she was going to keep an eye on them.

He placed a feather light kiss on her forehead before he pulled away. "I missed you, too."*

Riley draped an arm across Buffy's shoulders, and she smiled vacantly. She just didn't feel the interest in him anymore that everyone else expected her to show. Including him.

"Maybe you could make it up to me?" he whispered, and kissed her again.

Buffy sighed, closed her eyes, and pretended he was Angel.

//Didn't expect to be in this position
Didn't expect to have to rise above
My reputation for cynicism
I've been a jaded lady when it comes to love//

Part Three

"Well, what do you think?" Buffy asked, twirling around for her roommate's inspection. Her skirt went about to her knee with a slight flare. Her hair was pinned up away from her neck, actually showing off her bite scar instead of hiding it. Her top was cut low, and almost gave a glimpse of her fancy bra. She wouldn't tell Willow, but more thought had gone into the matching underwear than the rest of the outfit.

"I think Riley is going to be floored," Willow said with a grin.

Buffy smiled, but frowned inside. She wasn't dressing for Riley. She was dressing for Angel. However, in order to have an evening with Angel with no questions asked, she first had to agree to a date with Riley. So they were going out to dinner. He was paying. Buffy hated every second of it.

Surveying her own reflection in her mirror, Buffy perfected her fake smile. She was going out with Riley in the first place because everyone else expected her to. She liked him all right, but she didn't love him. She loved Angel. She loved everything about Angel. She loved the way he smiled just for her. She loved the way her kisses could make the pain in his eyes disappear. She loved him as a vampire, and she loved him as a man. She loved the way he could be standing behind her now and not appear in the mirror. She loved the small changes his growing humanity was bringing out in him. Each and every quirk, each and every word, each and every motion, was fascinating to her.

Riley's quirks, words, and motions were starting to get annoying. No, not *starting,* they were annoying already.

"Oh!" Buffy said suddenly, and frantically reached into her jewelry box realizing she'd forgotten something. She smiled when she withdrew the silver cross and it glinted in the light.

Willow looked at her oddly when she fastened the cross Angel had given her around her neck. "Why are you wearing that?" she asked softly.

"It's always a good idea to wear a cross at night," she admonished.

"But that one?" Willow sputtered.

"It's just a cross," Buffy said, and swept out of the room.

*****

"I had a really good time tonight," Buffy lied through her perfected false grin.

Riley smiled. "I'm glad." They stood outside Buffy's dorm, saying their goodbyes. "Can I come in for a minute?" Riley asked.

Buffy shook her head. "Willow's there. Studying. She's got this big test Monday, and you really don't want to disturb her."

Riley looked disappointed. "I understand. I'll see you." With that he leaned forward and kissed her. Buffy closed her eyes and returned it. She had to keep up appearances.

After a moment, Riley broke away with a small smile. "Bye," he whispered, and moved away.

Buffy neither moved nor replied as he walked off into the night. She absently wiped his kiss from her lips. When he'd finally disappeared, though, she smiled. "You can come out now," she said into the darkness behind her.

Strong arms wrapped around her from behind. "How did you know I was there?" Angel whispered.

"I always know," Buffy replied. "You've been watching me and Riley for half the evening."

"I have to protect my lady's honor," he said in a joking tone.

"I don't need anyone's protection," she argued. "I'm just trying to keep up appearances." Then she sighed and leaned back into his embrace. "I'm sick of this," she whispered. "Riley's my only link to the Initiative. But on top of that, everyone else expects me to be happy with him. Willow gets this *look* on her face every time I get back from a date with him. It's like he has his own private cheering section!"

Suddenly Angel swept her up into his arms and Buffy let out a slight 'eep.' He chuckled slightly and carried her into the night. "I don't need a cheering section," he whispered. "I've got you."

Buffy leaned into his chest. "It's not fair, though," she said. "Everyone seems to be pushing what they thing is best for me. Even you!"

Angel frowned. "Are we going to fight or can I make it all better?"

"How are you going to do that?" Her tone came out playful.

"Oh, I've got some ideas. You'll see." They kissed deeply.

The rest of the walk to the mansion went quickly, especially with Angel carrying her the whole way. He only put her down briefly when they reached the door so he could open it. Then he swept her off her feet again and carried her like a bride across the threshold.

"Angel!" Buffy gasped when she saw the inside of the usually somber house. Every surface was graced with candles, most especially leading to Angel's bedroom. It was like the room glowed.

"You like?" Angel whispered.

"I like," Buffy replied. "Now why don't you show me how you're going to make everything better."

"I can do that," Angel said with a grin. He carried her all the way into the bedroom before he placed her gently down on the bed. He sat beside her, then removed a blood red rose from a vase on the nightstand.

Buffy's eyes widened. "Angel what.?"

"Sssh," he whispered. "Why don't I show you."

And Buffy trembled in anticipation.

*****

The lovers lay together still in a haze of pleasure, radiating contentment. They relaxed in each others company, smiles gracing their faces. This was the way it should be.

Buffy sat up slightly against the pillows. "Wow," she whispered.

Angel chuckled and rolled so that his head was in her lap. "You liked?"

Buffy smiled. "I like you." She leaned forward in an attempt to kiss him when Angel gasped slightly. "What is it?"

Angel reached out a hand the was trembling slightly to touch her naked stomach. Then his head replaced his hand. His eyes were very wide.

Amusement and concern fought for dominance on Buffy's face. "What?" she demanded again.

He turned his head and kissed her stomach very lightly. Buffy laughed slightly at the movement. "You're pregnant," he whispered.

Buffy's eyes went very wide. She wanted to object, but part of her knew his words were true.

"You're pregnant, and it's mine," Angel whispered in awe. "I didn't think that was possible."

His words struck her to her core. She knew she *knew*.that every one of them was true. She smiled in pure delight and contemplated the new life they had created.

//Oh baby just to feel this feeling
That everything that you do gives me
It's been too long since somebody whispered
Shut up and kiss me//

Part Four

Monday afternoon after classes Buffy ran some errands before returning to the dorm. Specifically, she went to the drugstore to buy a home pregnancy test. She knew these things weren't always accurate, but all she needed was a confirmation of what she and Angel already knew in their hearts.

Buffy took the test before she got back to the room. That it came out positive was no surprise. She was pregnant. She went back to her room with a bounce in her step.

The scent of roses greeted her when she opened the door to her room. Willow looked up as she entered.

"You got a present," she said with a smile, pointing at the bouquet of roses on her desk.

Buffy grinned and pressed her nose into one of them to inhale its scent. Looking at the bouquet, she frowned slightly. "Where's the card?"

"There wasn't one," Willow explained. "There are also only eleven roses."

Buffy blushed and grinned. She knew who'd sent the flowers. She also knew where the twelfth rose was.

She must have said that last part out loud, because when she turned around Willow was blushing a brilliant scarlet. "I," she sputtered, "had no idea.Riley."

Buffy grinned, though not for the reason Willow thought. "Neither did I," she replied. /I doubt he has the imagination necessary./

"So, are you going to call him and thank him for the flowers?" Willow asked with a grin.

Buffy shook her head. She couldn't say that the flowers weren't from Riley. "I'll call him later. Tonight, after I patrol."

*****

After patrolling, Buffy returned to an empty dorm room. Buffy smiled into the quiet darkness. Every time she smelled roses now she was going to think of Angel. With him on her mind, she reached for the phone. Her fingers traced the phone number she knew by heart.

The phone picked up after one ring. "Angel Investigations. We help the hopeless," Cordelia said in a bored tone.

"Hey Cordy. It's." Buffy began.

"Hold on," Cordelia said then. Buffy heard her call out across the room. "Angel! Pick up the phone!" A pause, and voices in the background that Buffy couldn't make out. "Who the hell do you *think* it is?" Cordelia replied.

A click of another phone picking up. "Hey," Angel's pleased voice brought a smile to Buffy's face.

"Hey, Daddy," Buffy greeted with a slight laugh.

Angel chuckled in response. "I like the sound of that," he said.

"I thought you might," Buffy replied. "I got the roses you sent."

"I missed you. And I thought you'd like them."

"I did. And I missed you, too," Buffy agreed. "I almost ran to LA as fast as I could when I smelled those roses."

"Then why didn't you?"

"Because I have class, silly," Buffy replied. "Besides, Willow was there. She would have looked at me really oddly if I'd torn from the room."

"Yeah, I guess she might have," Angel replied. "When *are* you going to tell everyone about us?"

"I'll think of something," Buffy was saying when a slip of paper on the bed caught her eye.

*Buffy,* it said in Willow's hand writing. *Giles has something important to discuss with you. Please come to his house as soon as you get back from patrolling.*

"What's going on?" Angel asked when Buffy was silent for a time.

"Listen, Angel, I have to go," Buffy said reluctantly. "Giles wants to talk to me about something. Willow left a note."

"Alright," Angel said. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Buffy replied and hung up the phone. She looked at it longingly, tempted to call him back. She sighed and looked back at the note in her hands. Whatever Giles had to talk about it was surely important. Probably the end of the world, again.

Buffy was pretty sure she knew what to expect when she reached Giles' house. As usual, she opened the door without knocking. She was greeted by silence. Several pairs of serious eyes stared back at her. Even Anya and Spike were there.

"Okay, who died?" Buffy half joked.

Giles took off his glasses and cleaned them, then put them back on his nose. "Buffy. Please, sit down."

Buffy looked back and forth between the lot of them. Giles looked stern, but that could mean anything. Spike looked oddly amused. Willow wouldn't meet her eyes. Buffy couldn't help but flash back to when they had all confronted her about hiding Angel after he returned from Hell. "If you don't mind, I'd rather stand. What's going on?"

Everyone was silent and turned to look at Willow. She seemed to shrink under their gaze. Still, she tried bravely to meet Buffy's eyes. "I found this," she said softly, and help up the empty pregnancy test box.

"Oh," Buffy said and took a seat in the empty chair.

"Care to explain yourself?" Giles demanded sternly.

"So, I'm pregnant," Buffy defended herself. "There's no big deal here."

Spike laughed. "I told you the Slayer was knocked up," he said.

"No big deal!" Giles said angrily at the same time. "You are the Slayer! You do not have the luxury to be pregnant, let alone the time in which to raise a child!"

Buffy ignored his tirade for the moment and looked at Spike. "How did you know I was pregnant?"

Spike smirked. "Vampires can tell these things."

Buffy fought a smile as she remembered Angel's revelation on the subject. "Oh yeah," she whispered, then turned to look at Giles angrily. "And you. I don't have the luxury? Giles, are you implying that I'd be a bad mother? 'Cause if you are, then just say that."

"Not at all," Giles sputtered. "I think you'd be a wonderful mother. But as the Slayer, you have a responsibility. You know you can not fight while carrying a child."

"I can still fight now," Buffy defended herself. "I'm less than a month along. When it comes to the point that I can't fight, there's always the Initiative. And it'll leave more demons for Spike to beat up."

"But Buffy," Willow protested softly, "what about school?"

"I'll take a semester off," Buffy said. "I can take classes part time. I'll work this out." She looked over the group again. "Any further objections?" When there were none, she smiled coldly. "Good. Because this is *my* life, and the life of my baby, and by God I am going to do this."

The room was silent for a moment. "Does Riley know?" Xander asked. It was the first thing he'd said since Buffy had arrived.

"No. And you're not going to tell him."

Xander nodded reluctantly. "Well. I think our work here is done." He took Anya by the hand and together they left the house.

Willow and Spike followed their lead in short order. Buffy was about to go as well when she turned to look at Giles. "Are we okay?" she asked.

Giles' actions surprised her. He gave her a quick hug, then clasped her shoulders. "Good luck," he said sincerely. "Any child you have will be truly blessed to have you as a mother."

Buffy grinned. "Thanks. That means a lot to me." She left Giles alone then and stepped out into the darkness.

A presence on the porch surprised Buffy. "So I was wondering," came the unmistakably accented voice, "whether maybe your little boyfriend Riley isn't the father at all."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Buffy said as she hurried on her way.

Spike fell into step beside her. "Oh really? I saw the look on you face when I said how I knew you were pregnant. You already knew how but didn't want to say. I'm thinking that's how you knew you were pregnant in the first place. I think you've been shagging a vampire we all know and despise. Probably gone and cost him his pesky soul again, too."

Buffy whirled and grabbed Spike by the throat. "That's none of your business," she hissed.

Spike laughed. "So he *is* the father!"

"You keep your nose out of my life and out of his," Buffy said, squeezing slightly. "If you say another *word* about Angel to *anyone* I will pour holy water down your pants until you beg me to stake you."

Spike nodded and Buffy released him. He rubbed his sore neck. "I can see why the old man's so obsessed with you," he said with a grin.

"Shut up, Spike."

//There's something about the silent type
Attracting me to you
All business baby, none of the hype
That no talker can live up to//

Part Five

Buffy knew Willow's eyes were on her as she hurriedly packed her bag after her last Friday class. Willow had hardly spoken to her since she'd found out about Buffy's pregnancy. She finally made an exception, though, when Buffy slung the bag over her shoulder and made her way to the door.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to L.A. I want to tell my dad in person about, you know," Buffy lied.

"Yeah, I guess that's not the sort of the thing you say over the phone,"

Willow agreed. "So, um, good luck I guess."

Buffy nodded. "Thanks." She opened the door to leave and found another surprise. "Riley!"

The T.A. lowered her hand poised to knock somewhat sheepishly. "Hey Buffy," he said. "I was coming to see you, obviously." He looked at Buffy's bag curiously. "And you're going somewhere."

Buffy shrugged. "Yeah. I'm going to see my father in L.A."

"Again?" Riley asked in confusion. Willow watched the exchange oddly.

"Yeah, um, I have some things I need to talk to him about," Buffy tried to explain. "Listen," she said softly, "when I get back, I really need to talk to you."

"Alright," Riley said softly, still confused.

As Buffy brushed past him, she could still feel his and Willow's gazes on her back.

*****

"Honey, I'm home!" Buffy declared with a huge grin when she let herself into Angel Investigations. Then she laughed. "I've always wanted to say that," she explained to the two startled faces in the room.

Angel stood up quickly then and rushed to Buffy before she could cross the room. Out of thought of their audience he did not kiss her, but instead swept her up into a warm embrace, lifting her off the ground in the process. Buffy laughed lightly and kissed him before he put her down.

"Happy to see me?" she asked with a smile.

"Always," Angel replied.

Cordelia cleared her throat loudly. "Could you please not get too mushy before I leave? I want to have some appetite for dinner."

Buffy sighed and pulled away from Angel. "That's no fun," she pouted. Angel didn't let her get too far, though, and Cordelia rolled her eyes.

"That's it, I'm going!" she declared. "Please, lock the door before you do anything all over the office, okay? Don't want to scare away the few clients we get." With that she left the office and firmly closed the door behind her.

Immediately Buffy and Angel began kissing again.

"You know, she had a good idea," Buffy whispered.

"Hmmm?"

"About locking the door."

Angel laughed. He took a seat on the couch and Buffy sat herself in his lap. They were quiet for a moment. Angel wrapped his arms around Buffy's waist and she leaned into his shoulder and sighed. "I had a bad week," she said finally.

"What's wrong? What happened?"

"Willow found the pregnancy test I took," Buffy explained. "Then, instead of asking me about it, she went to Giles. So we all - and I mean *all* - had this big confrontation thing. Now everyone will barely talk to me. Riley's getting suspicious. And let's not even get into my mom's reaction!"

"I'm sorry," Angel said softly. Then he looked at her curiously. "Riley knows you're pregnant?"

Buffy shook her head. "No. He's suspicious of my busy weekends. Everyone else thinks the baby's Riley's, though. Well, except for Spike. He guessed the truth."

Angel smirked a bit at that. "Good for him"

Buffy frowned.

"Buffy," Angel explained softly, "you can't keep *us* hidden forever. They're going to figure out sooner or later. The longer you wait to tell them, the worse it will be."

"I know," Buffy whispered. She knew her friends. They had a tendency to find out thing in the worst possible way. "I just don't know how to tell them anymore. Not and destroy everyone's trust in me and loose my link to the Initiative." She sighed. "I hate this."

Angel interrupted Buffy's rambling with another kiss. She returned it eagerly, and when they broke apart she was smiling again. "Okay, I don't hate *this*," she declared.

"We'll figure out something," Angel assured her softly.

"We?"

"Of course. This concerns both of us. Unless you want to do it alone?"

"No!" Buffy said quickly. "I don't suppose you'd explain *for* me.?" she added sheepishly.

Angel shook his head. "But I'd explain with you," he assured her. "Whenever you want me, I'll be there."

Buffy smiled, a great deal more at ease. She leaned back into Angel's embrace. His words of comfort meant more to her than anyone else's.

He kissed her lips very softly. Buffy quite deliberately deepened it until it was strong and passionate. She could never get enough of being close to him. They had spent far too long apart and were determined to make up for it. He pulled her closer, and one of his cool hands rested on the bare flesh of her stomach. This was where she was meant to be.

Angel pulled away suddenly, and Buffy let out a whimper of disappointment. She opened her eyes to Angel's golden vampire one's. "I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice slightly distorted through his fangs.

Buffy said nothing, but placed a hand on the back of his head before he could pull any farther away. "Don't be," she whispered. She pulled his head down towards her and placed a delicate kiss on his wrinkled brow. His eyes widened in surprise. "I love every inch of you," she explained. She placed light kisses all over his face until she reached his mouth again and he did not pull away.

She ran her tongue along Angel's teeth, drawing her blood. Angel never fed enough, but ever since he'd been granted this half-vampire state Buffy suspected he'd been feeding even less. His small growl at the taste of her blood was all the confirmation she needed.

When she broke off the kiss, Buffy surprised Angel by titling her head to give him access to her neck. Her offer was clear; no words were spoken between them. Buffy tried to convey with a small smile all of the trust and all of the love she felt for him. She wanted him to take her blood. There was no other feeling quite like it - for both of them, she suspected.

His kisses at her neck made her shiver, and Buffy closed her eyes at the sensation. His gentle kisses almost drove her crazy until she felt the sharpness of his fangs. His bite was almost gentle, and Buffy shuddered from the sensation of his lips and tongue on the wound as he made her a part of him.

The door slammed open abruptly. "What the." a startled male voice cried. "Get the hell away from her!"

Angel broke from her neck with a growl and Buffy whimpered. A harsh hand on her arm pulled her from Angel's lap. The sudden movement combined with blood loss made Buffy's head spin. She was still dazed and watched for a moment with a strange detachment from behind the intruder.

Angel looked furious but did not get to say anything before the young man rushed at him. He was unarmed and ended landing in an undignified heap in the corner at a blow from Angel. When he struggled to his feet again he was holding a wooden stake. "Not the brightest vampire, keeping this lying around," he said.

His voice broke through Buffy's gaze and he climbed to his feet. "Riley." she said softly.

Neither of them heard her.

"Stop it!" Buffy yelled.

Angel and Riley turned to look at her in surprise. Riley's eyes went even wider when he took in Buffy's disheveled appearance. He looked back and forth between Angel and Buffy. "What's going on here?" he said softly.

Buffy did not reply. "What are you doing here, Riley?" She meant to sound stern, but her voice came out weary.

"I wanted to see you this weekend," he explained. "I followed."

"You followed me?" Buffy demanded angrily. "I said we'd talk when I got back, but that just wasn't enough for you, was it? You had to barge in here, attack my boyfriend." She swallowed her words, but it was too late.

"So that's it?" Riley said, quietly angry. "That's what you had to talk to me about? I thought *I* was your boyfriend, Buffy."

Buffy shook her head. "I'm sorry," she said softly. "I love Angel, and I have for a long time."

"He's a vampire!" Riley cried.

"You think I don't *know* that?" Buffy yelled back. "I *am* the Slayer, Riley."

"You know what I think? I think you're a slut who will sleep with anyone who *looks* at you," he replied. "I mean, first Parker, and now *that*?"

"Don't you *dare* talk to her that way," Angel growled.

"Why now?" Riley asked, finally meeting his eye. "She cheated on me with a *vampire.* I can say whatever I want."

Angel stepped forward dangerously and Buffy jumped in between the two of them. "That's enough!" she yelled. She turned to look at Angel. "I don't think the Powers That Be would be pleased if you tore him limb from limb."

Buffy turned around to find Riley smirking. "And you! You know what? I liked you, and I was trying to find a way to break up with you without hurting you. But you know what? I don't care anymore. Get the hell out of here before *I* tear you apart."

"Buffy." Riley began to protest.

"She said get out," Angel managed through barely suppressed rage.

As soon as the door slammed behind him, Buffy slumped against Angel's chest. She sighed. Angel held her close, supporting her in silence. She looked up to see that his face had returned to normal and she forced a smile. "Cordelia was right," she said.

"Oh?"

"We should have locked the door."

// Come closer baby I can't hear you
Just another whisper if you please
Don't worry 'bout the details darlin'
You've got the kind of mind I love to read//

Part Six

She thought she could handle this. She thought this demon would cause no problem. She hadn't taken into account that she wasn't quite in fighting form anymore. The loose fitting clothes fulfilled two purposes - she could fight in them, and they hid her changing figure.

The demon shrugged off her kick as if it was nothing. He, it, whatever, struck back with a blow that knocked the wind out of her. The fight was not going well. It looked like it was going to be short, with Buffy on the loosing side.

The next blow struck her in the stomach and Buffy felt herself go flying from the force of it. Something hard - a tree perhaps - stopped her progress and she slumped to the ground.

She heard the demon laugh as it approached her. It was the first sound it had made all evening. As her vision swam and the demon came into view again, Buffy briefly wondered how many lives it had taken with that one blow. Her, her child. Angel?

Suddenly the demon screamed as visible electricity like lightning struck it hard. Its cry was silenced and it fell with a ground shaking impact. She was still wondering what her fate would be as she too fell into darkness.

*****

"Oh good, you're awake!" was the first thing Buffy heard when she regained consciousness.

Buffy blinked her eyes wearily. "Willow?" Her roommate grinned and nodded. "Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital," Willow explained. "You were on the loosing end of a battle with well, we don't know what, because we didn't see it, but Riley and the Initiative got it. He brought you here."

"Oh," Buffy said softly.

"I'm sure he had a reason not to be here when you woke up," Willow tried to reassure her.

"I'm not seeing Riley anymore," Buffy explained softly.

Willow fell silent. Her face looked sympathetic, but no words came out. Not that it mattered; she didn't need any sympathy when it came to Riley.

"So where's the rest of the gang?" Buffy asked with a slight smile.

"Right here," came a voice in the doorway. Buffy turned her head to see Giles, Xander, Spike, and her mother all entering the room.

"Hey guys," Buffy said with a forced grin.

Giles nodded. "I'm glad to see you're awake," he said.

"But.?" Buffy prompted.

The ex-Watcher sighed. "I warned you against patrolling while carrying a child," he said.

"I'm sorry," Buffy said softly, "but I'm all right. And my baby, right?" She looked to all of them for reassurance.

"Yeah, Buffy," Xander said, "the baby's fine."

"Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?" a new voice broke in softly.

Everyone turned to the newcomer in surprise. Riley stood framed in the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest. He looked decidedly angry.

Everyone began talking at once.

"You never told him?" Willow asked in surprise.

"How could you?" Xander demanded.

Riley nodded in agreement. "Yeah, Buffy, how could you? How could you not tell me you're pregnant with my child?"

"You're the father?" Joyce asked him, her face clearly showing her disapproval.

"Yeah, I'm the father," Riley acknowledged. "The one and only. Buffy, why didn't you tell me? Even though we broke up I'd still like to support you. This is my child, too. I think I have some right to know! To have some place in the life of my child."

"It's not your child!" Buffy cried in frustration. Her eyes went wide when she realized that she'd said that out loud.

The entire room fell silent.

Willow spoke first. "Of course, Buffy. You're the pregnant one, it's *your* child."

Buffy shook her head, sighed, and sank into the pillows. "That's not what I meant, Willow, and you all know that."

Riley's expression went dark and angry. "Whose is it then, Buffy, huh? Who else have you been screwing around with? Aside from the vampire?"

Everyone except Riley and Buffy turned to look at Spike. "It bloody well isn't me!" he cried.

"No one, 'aside from the vampire,'" Buffy hissed.

"What vampire?" Willow asked softly.

"That's not the truth. Or the child is mine and you just don't want to admit it."

"Vampire?!" Xander asked in shock.

"That is the truth!"

"What vampire, Buffy?" Giles demanded, beginning to look angry.

"You're a liar as well as a slut. Vampires can't have children. Even I, as stupid as I may seem to *you*, know that."

"What vampire?!" Joyce finally yelled.

"Shut up!" Buffy cried and the room fell silent. Everyone was staring at her in shock. "Riley, get out. You will *never* talk to me like that again. As a matter of fact, you will never talk to me again. This is my child. In no way what so ever is it yours. You have no claim on either of us. Thanks for saving my life this evening, but get the hell out!"

He turned on his heel and stalked from the room. Everyone was silent in his wake.

Buffy sighed. "Did I really just have that conversation?"

No one replied to her. They all stared at her in silence and shock.

"What?" Buffy asked in confusion.

"Buffy," Giles said slowly, "what vampire?"

"Oh." Buffy laughed slightly, nervously. "You heard that, did you?"

"Buffy." Joyce said in warning.

Suddenly Spike began to laugh and everyone looked at him. "Are you all dense?" he asked.

"Stay out of this, Spike," Xander said, dismissing his comment. "What. Vampire. Did. You. Sleep. With?"

Buffy felt *very* uncomfortable. This was not how she imagined this revelation going. "Uh, can I make a quick phone call?"

Everyone stared at her aghast. "Buffy Anne Summers." her mother began.

"Don't any of you people *think?*" Spike suddenly demanded. "Only one vampire has ever managed to get into the Slayer's pants. That hasn't changed!"

For yet the millionth time, the room fell silent.

"Anyone else need to ask who the father is?" Buffy asked sheepishly.

// Talk is cheep baby and time's expensive
So why waste another minute more
Life's too short to be so apprehensive
Love's as much a symptom darlin' as the cure//

Part Seven

"Ugh, I feel like a whale," Buffy complained as she waddled around the kitchen. She was nine months pregnant and due any day. Her back and feet hurt, and she was exhausted. Little One kicking had kept her awake most nights. It was nearly impossible to get comfortable. She sank into a chair.

Joyce smiled in reassurance. "I was at least as big when I was pregnant with you," she said.

"Okay, now I feel guilty," Buffy said with a laugh. "I'm sorry for anything I put you through during pregnancy."

"You were forgiven long ago," Mrs. Summers replied.

Buffy smiled. She might complain and whine sometimes, but she never once regretted her decision to have this child. Okay, maybe once, when the gang had found about Angel and dragged her off to LA to confront him. But that hadn't been regret having to do with the pregnancy. That had been situational regret.

*****

As soon as Buffy was let out of the hospital, the lot of them (minus Spike) formed a parade to LA. In the lead was Mrs. Summers' car, Buffy in the passenger seat probably having the worst time of her life. Willow rode in the back seat and none of them spoke. Xander and Anya rode with Giles in his car following them.

Why they had all insisted on coming to LA was beyond her. She had barely managed to call Angel and warn him that they were all coming. So at least he had some warning before they all descended on him.

The car ride was silent except for the directions Buffy gave. It did not help her situation that she was so familiar with the route. Never had the drive seemed longer. When they finally reached their destination, Buffy jumped out of the car and ran inside before anyone else could move.

Angel was alone in the office when Buffy entered, sitting and nervously tapping a pencil on his desk. He stood as soon as the door opened. His face had the slightest expression of panic.

"They're right behind me," Buffy said out of breath as she rushed into the room. She went to stand beside Angel, and he pulled her into a quick embrace.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that alone," he said softly.

"It's okay, as long as we're together now," Buffy replied honestly. There were so many things that she never wanted to go through alone - the rest of her life was one of them.

Angel seemed to understand and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. Buffy smiled. "You're warmer than usual," she whispered, pleased.

By way of explanation, Angel replied just as quietly, "It's been a good week." He was prevented from saying anything more as the rest of the brigade entered the office.

For a moment the amassed group stared at each other in silence - Buffy's friends and family on one side, herself and her love on the other. No one knew what to say. It was Angel who spoke first. "Why don't we all go downstairs?" he suggested. "I think everyone would be more comfortable."

No one protested and the party continued downstairs. Offers of coffee and tea were declined and everyone took seats where they could find them. Everyone but Buffy and Angel, that is, who stood as though before I firing squad.

Giles, who seemed to have been designated group speaker, looked at them both seriously. "You know we all have a lot of questions," he said.

Angel nodded. "Perhaps it would be best if we told you the whole story and then you can ask any questions that we didn't answer."

At Giles' nod, the two of them began. Buffy told how she had run into Angel while visiting her father. Angel explained his new half-vampire situation and the resulting change to his curse. Buffy explained her decision not to break up with Riley immediately. Finally the explanations ran out and they waited for questions.

"I understand how Angel being, uh, vampire-leaning-towards-human now means he can have children," Willow said once, "but how do you know for sure that Riley's *not* the father?"

"Riley's an idiot," Buffy replied. "You really think I would have unprotected sex with him? Angel, on the other hand.." She smiled at him affectionately. "We're not used to *this* being an issue," she explained with one hand on her abdomen.

Willow blushed slightly and nodded.

There were several more questions. Giles asked things that were more technical in nature. He wanted to know what Angel's constantly altering state could mean for him and his child. He used a lot of words like 'unprecedented' and phrases like 'I'll have to consult my books,' which made Buffy fight a chuckle. Xander did some yelling early on that he hadn't gotten out of his system yet, but was silenced when the glares momentarily turned to him. It seemed to be unanimous that Buffy and Angel had made some poor choices, but that was over and all they could do now was deal with their effects.

When hours had passed and the apartment fell silent once again, the tension grew instead of dissipating. Everyone simply looked at each other, until their gazes fell upon Mrs. Summers, who had yet to speak.

"Mom?" Buffy asked nervously.

Joyce raised her gaze to meet her daughter's. She looked back and forth between Buffy and the man she obviously loved "What I want to know," she said at last, "is what the two of you plan to do now?"

*****

Acceptance came relatively easily that day, but welcome and trust had to be worked for. With Buffy no longer able to patrol, Angel accompanied them back to Sunnydale. He made himself useful quickly, fighting monsters in the evening and helping Giles research during the day. Somehow he managed to constantly stay ahead of the Initiative at the same time. Yet another reason to be thankful for his growing body temperature and ability to move around in the daylight.

As if the thoughts had summoned him, Angel's voice rang out from the front room. "Hello!" he called.

"We're in the kitchen!" Buffy called back. As her due date neared, Angel had been spending every possible moment with her. She loved every minute of it. To her surprise, her mom seemed to be enjoying having him around as well. At least, she hadn't kicked him out yet.

Angel entered the kitchen, smiling. "Good morning, Mrs. Summers," he said in greeting, then stopped next to Buffy and kissed her cheek. "Good morning, love."

Buffy smiled back. "Morning."

"Good morning, Angel," Mrs. Summers said, smiling as well. "I'm making breakfast if you want some."

"No, thank you," he replied politely. "I already ate."

Buffy looked at him with raised eyebrows, wondering if he meant normal food or.not. She wasn't sure with him these days. He just shrugged in response, though, and took a seat next to her at the kitchen table.

Buffy quickly changed her seat for his lap. He looked at her in surprise and wrapped his arms around her as best he could. "Nice," she sighed, "but still not comfortable."

Angel laughed slightly at that. "Well, thanks," he said sarcastically.

"Just wait," Joyce said with a grin. "Any day now and you'll be the one who has to deal with all of her complaining."

"I'm not that bad!" Buffy defended herself.

"I know," her mother said, "but add a crying infant and Angel's life is about to get a whole lot more exciting."

"I look forward to every minute of it," Angel replied sincerely.

Buffy smiled. One of the first things they decided when they stopped reacting and began planning was that Buffy would move into the mansion with Angel as soon as the baby was born. Not before that, though, because the mansion was in need of some serious clean up and repairs. The two of them had quite a laugh together when they decided to turn what was once Drusilla's room into the nursery.

Joyce put down a huge plate of eggs in front of Buffy. Angel's eyes went wide and Buffy laughed. "Hey, I'm eating for two here!" she defended herself. Everyone laughed slightly at that.

When the meal was done the three of them relaxed around the kitchen table. Buffy smiled, content for once. Angel and her mother were getting along. No one (except for Riley, who she hadn't seen outside of class since) blamed her for her actions when she had gotten back with Angel. Sure, people looked at her oddly as they would any very pregnant 19-year-old. It didn't matter. Hey, even *Xander* and Angel were getting along. So everything was great.

Suddenly a strange - and rather painful - sensation passed through Buffy's stomach. No, definitely not her digestion. "Uh, guys?" They both turned to look at her. "So, who's driving to the hospital?"

// Oh baby when I feel this feeling
It's like genuine voodoo hits me
It's been too long since somebody whispered.//

Epilogue

*It's a Girl!
We are proud to announce the birth of Ailia Rose Summers
Daughter of Buffy Anne Summers
Born December 20, 2000 at 3:35 P.M.
8 pounds, 7 ounces, 20 inches long
Both mother and daughter are doing fine*

The sight that greeted Buffy when she awoke warmed her heart like nothing else ever had. Angel sat in a chair by the window, the tiny form of his newborn daughter cradled in his arms. The blinds were open and the light of the sunset fell softly on them both. Angel spoke to the infant in a voice too low for Buffy to make out, but his instant love for the child shown through his every whispered word, his posture, and the smile secure upon his face.

Buffy did not want to interrupt their moment. Ailia began crying then, however. Angel tried to hush her, gently rocking her in his arms, when he looked over and saw Buffy. "I thought you were asleep," he said softly.

"I was watching you," Buffy replied. "She's probably hungry," she said, holding out her arms for her daughter.

Angel handed Ailia to her to feed. Buffy stared at their tiny creation in amazement. Such a perfect little person. As Ailia quieted at her mother's breast, Buffy smiled in awe. She was actually a mother.

She looked at Angel then to see his gaze locked on the baby as well. He reached out to gently touch Ailia's hand, fascinated as her tiny fingers reflexively curled around his own. Buffy knew he felt much the same way as her. They were parents, something they'd long thought impossible for them to be.

He raised his eyes to meet Buffy's gaze. The smile on his face was so filled with joy and peace that Buffy nearly wept with happiness, falling in love with him all over again.

"She's perfect, love," he whispered, echoing Buffy's own thoughts.

In a small town always under the shadow of darkness, a small child whose name meant light was born. Sheltered in the loving arms of two people always destined to fight the darkness, she grew strong in body and mind. She brought her light into their lives and the lives of others, and the Powers that Be smiled at the rightness of it all.

//Oh baby I can feel this feeling
That everything that you do gives me
It's been too long since somebody whispered
Shut up and kiss me
Shut up and kiss me//

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