Slayage Mishaps
by Pamela
FEEDBACK: I gotta have it! Show me love and I show you the next part!
SUMMARY: Set in AIL, Buffy is still hiding her pregnancy from everyone but Willow and Cordelia.
DISCLAIMER: I don’t own them. Don’t sue.
NOTE: Thanks to Mel for proofing!
"I don’t see what you’re so afraid of, Angel is, like, the perfect guy." Cordelia told Buffy as they sat at a table in the mall’s food court waiting for Willow to get her blizzard at Dairy Queen.
Buffy sighed. "It’s just, every time I open my mouth, either he says something, or I think of something else to say, or- worst of all- I stand there with my mouth open until I give up and shut it."
"Buffy, Angel is so in love with you, it’s sickening. And it’s not like he’s some young guy. I think he’s old enough to be a dad."
"I know, but we’re going to have a baby five months after we get married. That’s not the way we’re supposed to start our life together. We’re supposed to have a few years before we start our family."
Cordelia shrugged. "Oooh! You and Angel are going to be *unusual*! There’s a first!"
Willow walked over to them and held the ice cream out over to Buffy. "Want some?"
Buffy wrinkled her nose. "No thanks."
"I thought pregnant girls ate, like, *everything*?" Cordelia asked, completely oblivious to the fact that the three of them were not alone in the mall.
"Cordy, care to say it a little louder? There’s still a chance that the whole school might not know tomorrow!" Buffy told her sarcastically.
"Sorry!" Cordelia replied curtly.
"I haven’t had any cravings. I can’t hold anything down so I try not to eat."
"Oh, Buffy you have to eat!" Willow told her, taking a spoonful of the blizzard. "Don’t forget, you’re eating for two now."
"Don’t remind me!" Buffy groaned.
"If you ask me, you are making a way too big deal out of this." Cordelia told her.
"Cordy, she’s having a *baby*, that’s a pretty big deal!" Willow told the brunette.
"Oh, I know that!" Cordelia replied. "I meant the telling Angel part. I’m thinking, you tell him, he worries about how you feel, blah blah blah, he’s all excited, and you have wild animal sex- something I *never* get!"
Buffy rolled her eyes. "Our relationship isn’t based solely on sex, you know?"
"Buffy," Cordelia replied, leaning towards the blonde with a grin on her face, "judging by the fact that you’re with child, I’d say that there is no point arguing."
Buffy gave up, leaning back in her chair and staring off into space as Willow and Cordelia made idle chitchat before the girls continued with their afternoon summer clothes shopping. Of course, Buffy didn’t buy a thing because she couldn’t figure out what she could buy. She really needed her mother’s advice, but figured she ought to tell Angel first. Once her mother knew everyone would know. Secrets weren’t her specialty.
You couldn’t find anything you liked Honey?" Joyce asked her daughter as she shoveled a spoonful of scrambled eggs in her mouth. She was having scrambled eggs with ketchup kick. Buffy and Giles were having salads.
Buffy shrugged. "Wasn’t in shopping mode. You know how I am when I’m not in shopping mode."
"Why weren’t you in shopping mode?" Joyce asked, concerned. Even Giles was looking at her with worry.
"I have a test tomorrow. It’s just school and everything… it’s a lot to deal with. I’ll be feeling better once I graduate. Then I just have to worry about the wedding." Oh, and also the fact that I am in the family way, she thought to herself.
Mollified, Giles and Joyce turned back to their dinners, leaving Buffy to pick at her own and ponder over her dilemma. It seemed that was the only think she ever did lately.
Just to show Giles she was feeling better, Buffy insisted on patrolling that night. Luckily, he let her go alone. She hardly ever seemed to get time alone anymore, not that she usually minded it, but now she savored it. Most of the time, people were asking her if she was all right or just giving her funny looks. The rest of the time she was with Willow or Cordelia, who admonished her for not telling Angel about the baby.
She finally had peace and quiet. She had never been so happy about the lack of vampires as she propped herself on a tombstone and deliberated her options. She was pretty sure she was going to keep the baby. She’d decided abortion was out of the question, and adoption would be almost as hard. Now it was just a matter of telling Angel.
She was thinking of the best way to approach him when a hand clamped down on her shoulder. Without thinking, she jerked her arm out and punched her assailant right in the nose.
"OW!" Xander screamed as he fell to the ground.
"Xander!" Buffy exclaimed, helping her friend up. "What they Hell were you thinking, sneaking up on me like that?!"
"I was walking by and saw you!" Xander explained, his voice muffled by his hands covering his nose.
Buffy crouched beside him. "Let me see."
He removed her hand and she saw that his nose was bleeding quite profusely. Buffy bit her lip. "Uh oh…. Looks like I should take you to a doctor, come on."
She helped him up and walked him to her car. Unfortunately, Buffy was out of Kleenex, napkins, anything that might stop the bleeding. After a few minutes of searching, Buffy finally found something that might help stop the bleeding under the driver’s seat. After getting Xander situated, she rushed to the emergency room.
Cordelia couldn’t stop laughing.
"You’re sick, you do realize that, don’t you?" Buffy asked her from her spot next to the May Queen in the hospital’s waiting room. Buffy had called her at Xander’s request as they’d taken him to one of the rooms about twenty minutes earlier. Buffy had explained what had happened to Xander as soon as Cordelia arrived a few minutes earlier and had yet to stop laughing. As they walked to Xander’s room.
"Oh, come on Buffy, he had it coming. You’d think he would know better!"
"Good point." Buffy replied as they walked into his room.
As soon as Cordelia saw him she burst out laughing again. This time, Buffy joined her.
"What?! WHAT?!" Xander screeched.
"Do you know what is hanging out of your nose?" Cordelia asked, wiping the tears from her eyes.
Xander frowned. "What?"
Giggling, Cordelia replied, "A tampon!"
"AAHH!" Xander shrieked. "Buffy, why did you give me this?!"
"Xander," Buffy replied, laughing even harder. "It just seemed so perfect at the time."
Xander was in a panic, trying to yank the tampon out. Unfortunately, he didn’t realize that the tampon expanded when it absorbed moisture. The two girls had to calm him down and then argue, until Buffy gave in and gently worked the object out of his nose.
"How did it go tonight?" Giles asked as Buffy walked in the front door, later that evening.
Grinning, Buffy started up the stairs and told him. "You wouldn’t believe me if I told you."
The End